I recently have become infatuated with this song by Regina Spektor entitled “Laughing With”. The lyrics are very clever. I normally don’t spend much time with poetry-esque things, but I’ll make an exception for this song. Here are the lyrics; here is the song.
First, is this song written from a religious perspective? Second, is this song a series of observations, or is it a critique? If it is a critique, of whom is it a critique? I’ll answer the first two questions in this post, and answer the third question in subsequent posts.
First. I’m not sure that ‘religious’ is a good adjective in this question. It is my experience that everyone thinks they know what it means, but everyone understands the term differently. I think the question can be focused better if we replace ‘religious’ with ‘believer’s’. So, is this song written from the perspective of a person who believes in God?
While there are some wonderful ambiguities in this song that offer several different ways to interpret them, I think the speaker’s belief in God is indisputable. In order to prove this, I need to show that there is an aspect of this song that cannot be explained from both a believer’s and a non-believer’s perspective. Aspects that can be explained by both does not cut against either interpretation. Thus, my goal is to show that there is an aspect of this song that does not lend itself to atheism, but can only be explained if the speaker believes in God. If this song were written from an atheist’s perspective, God would exist in the mind as a concept, but not in reality. For the believer, God must exist in the mind and in reality. Thus, if I can show that this song assumes God exists in reality and not merely in the mind, then I will have shown that the song writer believes in God. I propose to demonstrate my point by analyzing the theme of laughter in this song.
The song begins with a string of statements with the structure, “no one laughs at God in x”. In the next phase, the song switches to statements about ways in which God can be funny. Until the end of the song, no different types of statements are introduced. However, the last statement is different: “we’re all laughing with God.” The statement has its origin in a common expression: “We’re not laughing at you, we’re laughing with you!” The saying is usually used when a person or group is making someone the target of his jokes. When someone calls him out on his humor because it is in some way in bad taste, the jokester may defend his conduct by saying that he was never ridiculing the person in the first place. Humor can injure someone if the object of the joke does not wish to be teased. But if the object of the joke sees the point of the humor, then the joke is not ridicule, but good fun. In fact, even if the object of the joke doesn’t get the humor, but the jokester is attempting to help the object see his situation in a more humorous/less serious way, the jokester may be doing the object a favor. For example, if a man is upset because his girlfriend broke up with him, and his friends can make him “step back” from the pain he is feeling and see some previously unseen irony or humor in the situation (e.g. “dude, when your girlfriend asked if she looked fat in that dress, at least you were honest!”), it can help alleviate the pain.
Up until that point, God could be treated as either a concept or a person. We can laugh at both concepts and people. We have discussed how people can be the object of ridicule already. Concepts can be the object of jokes, too. For instance, atheists make jokes about God all the time, or ridicule God as a glorified Santa Claus. If they are correct and God does not exist, then they are ridiculing a concept, not something that actually exists in reality. Furthermore, it is possible to not laugh at both concepts and persons. We always have the option of not using humor and seriously entertaining a concept, and we can always choose not to use humor and treat a person’s suffering, circumstances, dignity, etc seriously. Thus, throughout the entire song, neither belief nor disbelief in God is clearly demonstrable. However, the last line cannot be accommodated into an atheistic interpretation of the song in which God is a mere concept and does not exist in reality. It is possible to laugh at either a concept or a person; but it is not possible to laugh with a concept. Concepts are not capable of laughter: only really existing people are.
The clever part about these lyrics is how the very last sentence changes the entire meaning of the song. Until the last line, the lyrics presented a simple contrast: we laugh at God when times are good, but we don’t laugh at God when times are bad; God is an object of ridicule in good times, but we don’t ridicule him in bad times. Not laughing, laughing. Not ridiculing, ridiculing. Yet the last line in some way changes the meaning of the “not-laughing” segments of the song: we are not laughing at God, we are laughing with God. The statement “we are not laughing at God” means that we do not laugh at God. Period. To say, “we do not laugh at God, but we laugh with God” implies that we are laughing, but God is not treated derisively as the object of our jokes, but as an object of good-natured, non-abusive humor.
We now must explore how (i.e. the “in some way”) that the last line changes the entire meaning of the song. Does this song imply that we are laughing at all times, in the good times and in the bad times, whereas without the last line we would simply be contrasting situations in which we don’t laugh at God with situations in which we do? I don’t think so. First, because it’s patently false. No one actually laughs at God in the circumstances mentioned in the song. No one laughs at all-whether at God or with God—when the police come to his door, and the same can be said for the rest of situations mentioned in the “no one laughs at God” segments of the song. No: the last line of the song changes the meaning in a more subtle way.
I suggest that the song needs to be understood as a narrative of a person’s or group of people’s life. Perhaps some people experience good times before they experience bad times; others may experience bad times before the good times. Yet most people experience both. In the bad times, we take our own pain seriously and ask God for help just like we would ask a friend for help (the song does not directly say that we ask God for help, but it is strongly implied: in the good times, we make jokes about God as if he were a genie or Santa Claus that grants wishes. In the bad times, we really wish or hope that he does grant wishes like a genie!) Then, when times are good and we are not in need of God’s help, we make all sorts of jokes about him, jokes that do not portray God in a favorable light (e.g. we make jokes about how God hates us, or as if he were at our beck and call like a genie or Jiminy Cricket). Then, when times get bad again (or for the first time), we beg for God’s help again. However, if we ask for someone’s help after we have ridiculed them, what is their natural response? To say no, of course! So it’s as if the person is saying, “God, would you help me out here? What? Oh, those jokes? You don’t think I was actually being serious, do you? I wasn’t laughing at you! I was laughing with you!” Thus, under this interpretation we do not laugh at God in the bad times, but we try to excuse the jokes we made when times were good. This interpretation preserves the laughing v. not-laughing distinction that is found throughout the song, and it also explains how we can be laughing with God in situations in which normal people never laugh.
Second. We have finished discussing the theme of laughter in this song. Next, we ask whether the song’s speaker is criticizing anyone, or whether she is merely making observations. If we consider the words themselves, it is clear that the speaker only presents a list of observations. In no place does she make any normative statements, such as “you shouldn’t be doing that” or “x behavior is immoral/stupid/etc”. And yet, while there are no manifest judgments in this song about how we treat God in good times and in bad times, the song’s observations suggest certain critiques.
How does this happen? Humans by nature tend towards certain goods that assist in the perfection of their nature, such as life, health, food, pleasure, security, freedom, etc. My purpose is not to give an account of human happiness and how these goods must interact in the life of a flourishing human being. The important thing to note is that these things are good, and their negations are seen as evils: death, sickness, starvation, pain, defenselessness, slavery. Normative statements about such evils are built into human nature. One cannot be human without in some way fearing one’s own mortality, or not liking sickness, starvation, pain, etc. We don’t get to choose what the ultimate ends of human nature are–even if we can choose to pursue some more than others.
Because certain things are seen as good or evil by virtue of our human nature, it follows that certain facts imply certain values. So if someone merely observes that another person has actively brought one of these evils about, the observation implies a critique. For example, let’s say that Steve walks into a room in which Dave is standing over the body of Sally with a knife in his hand dripping with her blood. Let’s say that Steve walks into the room and says, “Dave, I see that you killed Sally.” Because we are completely and utterly instantiated in our human nature, it is nearly impossible to leave such statements as mere observations. It’s as if the observation demands an interpretation or a normative statement. The situation with Steve and Dave has a much different character than a situation in which Steve says to Dave, “Dave, I see that you are drawing a picture”, or “I see a shooting star.” In both cases, Steve can be making an observation without necessarily making any normative judgments. The earlier example does not lend itself to mere observations, but almost begs for a normative interpretation.
If God exists, which the song writer clearly believes, and this God is personal, i.e. someone who can laugh and be laughed at, and someone who can be the subject of petitionary prayer, then God’s existence is not just a mere fact among facts. God’s existence has something to do with our happiness. Our relationship with this God becomes a human good, just like health, life, or any of the goods mentioned earlier. Thus, while the speaker is merely making observations about how we act towards God in good and bad times, her observations demand a normative interpretation: our treatment of God is too closely related to our own flourishing as human beings not to require a normative interpretation!
In the next set of posts, I shall examine who the song’s speaker criticizes. If you appreciated the discussion in this post, or admire the cleverness of the song, I think you will appreciate it more after seeing how clever the criticisms are!